December 2, 2000
© Invisible America
In yet another stunning development in what is now becoming a hemispheric chaos around various presidential elections, the Peruvian presidency has now been offered as a prize to the loser of the North American elections.
Peruvian officals stated that the timing between their presidential crisis, and the North American one, was coincidental, but too perfect to not take advantage. "The United States of America has in recent years, increased it's role in Peruvian politics," explained ousted ex-president Alberto Fujimori, "the CIA was funding many of my military operations, and during my term I followed the North-American economic model, privatizing state-owned businesses, and selling them to foreign investors. To have either Gore or Bush as president here would be nothing more than a completion of our already strong relationship." Alberto Fujimori fled from Peru, and found asylum in Japan a few weeks ago.
When pushed for further comment on whether or not The United States' interventions in the Peruvian economy, military, and now presidency, were just new forms of imperialism, Fujimori's only comment was "Oh yeah....don't send us Ralph Nader."